A dedication to Lim ChangMin: you're so dear to my heart ♥

seriously, i miss you =/

you know what? i had a dream about you last night. and it wasn't quite a good one. a very BAD one in fact.

In the dream, i was back home from outstation (perhaps KL) and the last time i left, you were bitten (by some other stupid dog maybe) at the thigh. And when i got home, i found that you were hopping towards me. there were 2 big holes on your thigh.. It seemed like no one tended to the wounds and it worsened. and here's the bad news: you WERE dying. thank God for the "were", as in it's not true, as in "as if".

But i was really sad to know that you WERE gonna leave me. and it broke my heart to see that you couldn't run, or gallop, like i always prefer to use on you =). we were at a waterfall, you were watching other dog/children having fun running here and there, and wanted to but i couldn't. and i wouldn't let you too. because i just couldn't bear seeing you being in pain. because i wish you could stay by my side longer.

and then somehow i woke up. and thank God it was a dream. and i started to cry. and i started to miss you like crazy. but i don't know when i could go back to you. even if i could soon, i would have to leave you again soon. i was thinking if i should just go back to Sibu and get a job back home. i felt bad leaving you home alone. but... please forgive me. you'll get sick and throw up whenever we brought you to the vet in car, so it's next to impossible i could bring you out to my side here.

you were a gift from Evelyn on my 19th birthday, and so i declared that your birthday's the same as mine. you were such a little cute puppy back then. and still is, of course, just the "little" changed into "large" ^^ honestly, i chose you because you looked like Courage. but you're no longer a replacement, surely. you're you, Lim ChangMin =)

However, these days i've been, like, counting your age and started to feel down. you're around 4 years old. you're getting old. that's why i started to decide to cut down your food (sorry for that, i know how much you like to eat. like me XD) and brought you to exercise. regardless of how much i love your gas-tong body and full tummy.

I'm really happy that you'll stick with me when i go cycling around the house. and i'll never ever forget that you rushed - literally rushed - to block the stupid dogs which were barking and growling at me. believe me, i was truly touched =) now that i come to think about it, it seems like that wasn't the first time you're protecting me.. thank you my dear =)

you bring joy to my life.. tonnes and tonnes of them ^^
you're my companion, my hero. a super tight friend, you are =)